Beautiful Stuff

I was feeling like a pumpkin space latte, so I went to Foxtail Coffee to see if they have something cheaper than Starbucks (which costs $7…!). They don’t (but I have a gift card). But what they have tastes better; it has a better pumpkin flavor. It’s like drinking a pumpkin pie.

On a positive note: After I got my latte I went to sit outside on the patio to enjoy my drink with a smoke (did you know tobacco compliments pumpkin?). While I was sitting there I thought what a great time this is to be alive (that could be the coffee talking) : in this era, in this country, in this state, in this town (I mean city. Sorry, but where I come from we say town). There is so much beautiful stuff going on; I can’t be specific, but I know it in my heart. For all the terrible, there is good, even if it’s fleeting. Robert Frost said “nothing gold can stay” (in the poem of the same name). If it’s fleeting, it’s fleeting forever, one beautiful moment after another. Why can’t we make it all last? I think because there’s too much and it’s going too fast; the world would explode (woah). In her childhood memoir Annie Dillard uses the phrase “O Augenblick verweile,” which is German for Oh moment, linger. 

On a less positive note: If reincarnation is real, we will get to come back to this earth again (only we won’t know it). That could be great, but if you don’t like it here…that sucks (maybe your next life will be better…?). I don’t know about you, but I think one lifetime is enough; as in I’ve had enough for one life. I like all the beauty and love stuff. I’m semi romantic (I will do the candlelight dinner, but I’m not about the wine!). I’m just burned out. Like I got a little too hot on this life thing. But I’m trying to renew my sense of wonder, like I’m trying to enjoy life without a cocktail, which is why I’ve got to buy myself an expensive coffee every now and then, while trying not to think too hard about concepts like reincarnation (please let me come back as a cat!). 

Through my journaling I just came up with a new phrase: “forever and everything.” Think about that. But not too hard. I don’t want your head to explode.

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